Friday, August 12, 2011

Chemical Therapy

Tonight I go camping. Whoo hoo!  We've done nothing to prepare, but luckly we keep most of the important stuff in one grey tub.  Just grab that and go!

This week has been bad for my anxiety....I've been on extreme edge all week.  Wednesday was the worst.  I got home and curled up in the bed and started shaking all over because I was so tense.  It was like I was preparing to explode.  Josh sat with me and tried to help, and did very well, but when you are trapped in your own mind, you are the only person who can get you out.  I took an adavan, a pill that relaxes you just for a little while.  It helped amazingly!  For a few short hours it was like I was a normal person.  I even got some housework done!  Drinking with an Adavan isn't recommended, so I didn't drink.  This is good b/c I used to turn to beer to help me when I felt that much anxiety.  Beer affects the same part of the brain as anti-anxiety medication, so it makes sense.  But it never helped in the long run and I just felt like crap.  So being able to turn to the adavan helped me make a good smart decision to not drink.

Plus I'd have to spend 8$ on Woodchuck Cider because beer has gluten in it and I don't eat gluten anymore, currently. 

The most unique thing I've seen recently happened yesterday morning.  Josh and I were enjoying our coffee outside on our porch and a guy backed out of his parking spot into a car driving by.  No one was angry and I don't think the cars even got hurt.  But it made a good crunching noise.

Here is a good list of my long term interests:
1.  Crunching noises
2.  Cats/kittens
3.  Ants going about their day
4.  Earrings
5.  Painting


And I just got distracted because I realized I can paint tonight while camping!

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