Wednesday, April 7, 2010

It's All the Truth. I Swear it.

I have several important things to tell you.  I'm pretty sure you are better off not knowing any of them.

1.  IT was 14 inches long!!!! Holy moly.  I called Josh immediately to tell him.  It's a record.

2.  I think it's impossible for me to be a Hipster because I have a real job that pays me.  THOUGH some would argue *Calvin* that I am over educated and underpaid for my job, but he has always had what I thought was overly optimistic views on what my starting salary should be.  To be fair, I've always shot too low on what I thought I should get paid and am actually making my life goal right now.  Either way, since I am satisfied with my job and salary that means I am not a hipster.
Other reasons why I am not a hipster:
-I do not wear ironic tee shirts
-I am trying not to bring the 80's back
-I have no tattoos
-or weird piercings
-When I go to a coffee shop, I do not look down upon those dressed well and with obvious money.  I look down on everyone, money or no.
-I do not drive a Volvo (ha!)
-I go to a bible study, I'm not sure if this makes me not a hipster, but it seems like something very un-hipstery.
-My bangs are even across my forhead
-I have more realistic views on how I'm going to save the world...if hipsters even want to do that

3.  Speaking of tattoos...the tramp stamp is growing on me.  I've been thinking of getting one, but I don't know what.  Something classy like doves.  Gross, that was obvious sarcasm.  Doves?!?!  No way.  Yeah, let me know if you have an idea of a classy tramp stamp 'cause I can't think of anything.  Clearly when I say "I've been thinking of getting one" means I haven't actually put thought into it at all.  I just have a list of things NOT to put a bible verse or my dead children's names.  I don't have dead children or live ones.  The more I think of it, the more I am unsure if a classy one exists.  I don't want the classic swirly design either... I want something subtley sexy.


Anonymous said...

I'm sorry but even though I am not hipstery, but I am kind of "cool", I still don't know what a tramp stamp is.

Db said...

"Kind of 'cool'" is FAR superior to being Hipstery. That's why talked about me not being a hipster...I don't want to be one, but I do have hipster tendencies sometimes. Like knitting. If you knit then you've probably got some hipster in you.

A Tramp Stamp is a tattoo that is located on a girls lower back, just above her bum. I've known they were called Tramp Stamps for a while now but thought it was because lots of girls got them (they were popular for a while) and lots of girls are tramps. While listening to the morning radio show during the past month, I found out that whatever is tattooed there is what the guy will be looking at if you are doing it Doggy Style. dead children's names or bible verses.

Since they are sort of out of style and sort of trashy I want one because it would be ironic. Which is a VERY hipster thing to do, be ironic. And since I don't want to be a hipster I probably won't get one.