Monday, May 4, 2015

Having Fit Pelvic Muscles Is An Important Thing

Saturday was Girl's Shopping Day for my mom, sister, and I.  Normally I don't like shopping and going to the mall, but my mom was going to buy Mandy and I something nice, and when she offers, one does not say no!  Plus, she buys quality stuff, and I love quality.

First we went to TJMaxx and were suppose to meet up with Mandy.  My mom told me to tell Mandy we'd be there in 20 min, and I said that to Mandy, but added that I didn't think that was right.  We got to TJ's earlier than I thought and Mandy wasn't there.  I went to text her, and surprise! She was calling me! At the exact same moment!  Turns out she didn't believe mom either, and was late, and then showed up to a different TJMaxx.  Well, no wonder we were confused...there's more than one!

As a mom now, I have connected to my mother in a new way.  The second we get to a store in GR, we have to pee.  Right away, first thing.  Mandy and I spent many of these shopping trips in the past making fun of her for that.  We sang the Gotta Go Right Now jingle to her and reminded her there was medication for that.  Turns out it's just a side effect of moms.  So, you non-moms, you have been warned.  Birthing babies messes up your bladder too.  Guess what happens when I have a particularly violent sneeze.  Anyways, we headed to the bathrooms first thing and one stall was being cleaned.  No matter, there were two more, and there were no signs up about not coming in.  When we washed our hands, we noticed that the person cleaning was a guy!  A guy heard us pee!!!  Ha ha ha. It was such a strange experience.  It was only weird because our culture says it's weird and uncomfortable, but rationally, I didn't care.  I mean, peeing is peeing.  I clearly talk about it all the time in public.  So I just pretended I was in Europe or on Ally McBeal.  Also, I realized, I do like separate bathrooms, but wouldn't at all care if a transgender woman was in there with me.  Woman's bathrooms are a secret club all about being a woman.  If a person is transitioning into being a woman, the woman's bathroom is the best place to go about learning about how to be a woman.

We met up with Mandy at Cabella's.  It apparently was a big shopping weekend, and they were grilling out out front.  We got free smores and I split a braut with Mom and then split another one with Mandy.  Then I returned a pair of shoes, getting cash back!  Woot.  And then we left.  Why ruin a perfectly good trip to Cabella's with shopping and stress?  Instead I got money and free food.  Perfect.

At the mall I insisted on stopping at Sephora.  There I asked for a person to help me find a concealer, and the Color Associate they called up was a guy too!  So, for the first time ever, I had a guy put makeup on me and help me.  He did an excellent job.  My very first reaction was "Does he even know about makeup?" but really, he wouldn't work there if he didn't.  Plus, he was wearing some too.

Then we headed to the good store, Eddie Bauer, and tried on ALL THEIR CLOTHEs and took up a big changing room and made the helpers run around getting us different sizes.  I stepped out to find my own clothes to try on and another worker came up and asked me if I needed help.  His name was Troy, and he reminded me of me when I worked at J. Jill.  He was doing his best to do a good job and be genuine, but really, this was just a job to him.  He was also 19.  He asked me if I needed help picking out clothes and what colors I liked.  I didn't, but I was just sooooo curious to see what he would say, so I let him help me.  He basically gave me the speil I would give at J.Jill...just repeating what he was coached to say and not doing a good job of making it original and his own. Only people who are passionate about jobs like this, I think, would make it original and their own, so it wasn't bad at all.  I just saw through it easily.  He just finished his freshman year at Grand Valley State Uni and is going to be an industrial artist...designing cars and the stuff we use everyday in our houses.  Isn't that amazing?  I love asking college kids what they are studying because they always want to be something amazing I had never even dreamed was a job possibility.

Sidenote:  My mother gifted me with an awesome spring/fall jacket!

To summarize, on one trip, a guy heard me pee, put makeup on me, and helped me buy clothes.  Is this progress towards gender equality? Or, are these men taking all of our (women) jobs?  Sort of reminds me of the argument that all of the immigrants (legal or illegal) are taking all of our American (white) jobs.

I don't know or care to think about it right now.  I'll rest on it.  Just putting it out there as Thought Food.  But that last paragraph is super opinionated and fight charged.  Pretend I said it while shoving my tongue into my cheek.  That's how I wanted it to sound.

OR I JUST REALIZED THIS!!  I was waited on by men all day.  Maybe us women's finally made it to the top!  Heh.  I like this one.


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